Money

Take steps to reduce your money anxiety

‍Because worrying won’t fix it, but doing something might.

By Bron Maxabella

If you find yourself feeling more anxious about money than ever before, you’re in good company. Even those of us who’ve worked hard, saved sensibly and avoided big financial risks can still find ourselves lying awake at 3 am worrying about super balances, the rising cost of living, or whether the money will last.

It’s not just about dollars and cents, either. It’s about security, identity and the enormous life transition that retirement (or getting ready for retirement) represents. You might be wondering if you’ll have enough to stop working, or it might be more fundamental than that: plenty of us are still carrying a mortgage or other debts at this stage of life. And whoever said that kids don’t cost you anything once they reach adulthood clearly never had kids!

Whether you’re concerned about outliving your money, helping your adult children, downsizing or just managing the basics, money anxiety is real and it deserves your attention. Thankfully, there are ways to ease it. Starting now.

It’s not just you

According to the 2025 Financial Resilience Index published by the Financial Services Council, 55% of New Zealanders now worry about money on a daily or weekly basis, and only 44% say they feel prepared for retirement – the lowest level recorded since tracking began in March 2020. 

This data highlights growing financial stress across the country, especially in areas like retirement readiness and coping with the rising cost of living.

In the face of statistics like these, it might seem hard to stay hopeful – but that’s exactly where optimism can make a real difference – and we’re not talking about blind positivity or pretending everything’s fine! 

Optimism is closely linked to hope – and it really does matter. Optimistic people and communities are more likely to take chances, find creative solutions, try new things, strengthen relationships and bounce back more easily when life throws a curveball. They’re also more likely to feel less anxious – and that includes worrying less about their financial health.

So, what can we do?

First, get support

When money stress is high, you don’t have to deal with it alone. There are plenty of free resources in New Zealand that are there to support you with both your money and your mental health:

And if you’re not in crisis but simply confused or overwhelmed, a good financial planner can help you take stock and map a way forward.

What’s really going on?

Money can feel like a tangible, practical worry but it often masks deeper fears.

Maybe you’re worried about your retirement, but what’s really bothering you is the idea that your best earning years are behind you. Or maybe you obsess over bills because it’s easier than facing a crumbling relationship or career burnout.

It’s worth asking yourself:

  • What’s really going on for me right now?
  • What feels uncertain, out of control or unsafe?
  • Am I avoiding something by focusing on money?

Sometimes, the anxiety isn’t about money at all, but money becomes the container for everything else that feels hard. That’s okay. It’s a good starting point.

Is your stress short-term or long-term?

There’s a difference between a shock bill that throws your week, and the long-term dread that you’ll never get ahead financially.

Short-term stress might look like:

If that’s you:

Long-term money anxiety, on the other hand, is usually tied to persistent debt or fear of the future. You might find yourself repeating the same habits – overspending, avoiding bills, borrowing from savings – even when you know better… Sound familiar?

This kind of stress needs a different kind of action.

Change the story

Here’s the good news: money isn’t a mystery. We can learn to manage it. Even if you’ve made mistakes in the past (we all have). Even if you feel “too old” or “too behind” to turn things around (you’re not).

Start small with these 4 key areas:

1. Reduce your debt

Debt has a way of keeping us up at night, yes, even the “good” kind. But there are ways to ease the load, and you don’t have to do it all at once. From tackling credit cards to shaving years off your mortgage, you can clear the decks and breathe easier:

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2. Control your spending

You don’t need to give up your daily coffee or live off two-minute noodles to get on top of your spending. It’s about spending smarter, not harsher. These tips will help you cut waste, find great deals, and make the most of your money:
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3. Increase your income

Boosting your income in midlife isn’t just possible, it might be the smartest move you make. Whether you want to start a side hustle, build passive income or delay retirement just a little longer, there are more options than you might think. These ideas can help you earn more without burning out:

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4. Plan for your future

Looking ahead doesn’t have to be scary, in fact it’s the key to feeling calm and in control. Exploring retirement strategies and making savvy financial choices now can help you build a future that feels not just secure, but exciting. Here’s where to begin:

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Even making a rough plan can dramatically reduce stress. It gives your brain something to do with all that anxious energy.

[CAPTION] Take charge of your story with simple steps to get on top of things and reduce your money anxiety. Image: iStock/MixMedia

Build a better relationship with money – starting now

We all carry stories about money, some helpful, many not. Maybe you picked up the idea that money is hard to understand, or that you’re “just not good with it.” Maybe you learned to avoid it, fear it or tie your self-worth to it. Or maybe “money doesn’t grow on trees” is imprinted in your brain, lodged somewhere between “you’ll catch your death in that” and “don’t sit too close to the TV or your eyes will go square”?

However you landed where you are, you can change that story, starting today.

Here’s a simple approach to shifting your mindset so money feels less like a weight and more like a tool that works for you.

Get curious, not critical

Instead of judging yourself for how you feel about money, get curious. Find a quiet moment and ask yourself: What does money mean to me? Don’t rush the answer. Let the words come freely without filters or editing.

You might surprise yourself with what bubbles up. Common ones? “Money is a source of stress.” “Money makes me feel ashamed.” “Money gives me freedom.” Every answer is valid and worth exploring.

Notice the emotional baggage

Our thoughts about money trigger feelings, often without us realising. Once you’ve uncovered a few of your core money beliefs, take a moment to check in with how they make you feel.

Does a particular belief make your shoulders tense or your stomach twist? Does it weigh on your mind in the dead of night? Or does it give you a sense of calm and control? Understanding your emotional response is the first step toward rewriting the script.

Gently flip the script

Now try experimenting with a new version of the story. This doesn’t mean ignoring reality or slapping a “live, love, laugh” sticker on things. It’s about opening the door to possibility.

If your belief is “I’m hopeless with money,” try softening it to “I’ve made mistakes, but I’m learning.” If it’s “Money always causes arguments,” try “Maybe clearer communication could ease some of the tension.” You don’t have to fully believe the new version, just play with what it would feel like to try.

Take one small step

Mindset without action is just theory. Once you’ve identified a more helpful way of thinking about money, look for a small action that aligns with that new belief. It might be checking your bank account once a week instead of ignoring it; cancelling a few subscriptions you’re not using; or listening to a money podcast on your morning walk.

These little steps add up to something powerful: a feeling of progress.

Remind yourself: this is a skill, not a talent

No one is born knowing how to budget, invest or save. These are all learned skills and the learning never stops. Having a “money mindset” isn’t about having it all together; it’s about being open to change and willing to try.

Think of it like going for a walk every day. The first one feels uncomfortable and challenging, but after a while you find your rhythm. The same goes for checking in on your money.

[CAPTION] It won’t suit everyone, but opening up via a supportive counselling group is very beneficial for many. Image: iStock/dikushin

Connection is currency

One of the hardest parts about money anxiety can be the shame. It keeps us silent and stuck, but opening up (even just a little) can change everything.

Talk to someone you trust and tell them you’re feeling stressed. You don’t have to give them your full spreadsheet, just say: “Hey, I’ve been feeling anxious about money lately. Do you ever feel that way too?”

Chances are, they’ll say yes.

If that feels a bit too daunting, there can be reassurance in anonymity. Try reaching out to one of these groups, either online or in person:

MoneyTalks
They offer a free, confidential helpline offering budgeting advice and support for anyone experiencing financial stress. They can also connect you with financial mentors in your area.   Visit MoneyTalks 

Christians Against Poverty (CAP NZ) 

Provides free, face-to-face debt help and budgeting support across Aotearoa, particularly for people on low incomes. Friendly and non-judgmental. Visit CAPNZ 

FinCap Budgeting Services Connects you to free financial mentors across New Zealand who can help with debt, budgeting, and long-term financial plans. Visit FinCap 

Money groups on Meetup
Search “money” or “finance” on Meetup and you’ll find active groups in most major cities. These groups range from casual discussions to structured workshops on saving, budgeting and investing. Browse Meetup money groups

Look after yourself, too

You’ll manage your money anxiety better when you’re caring for your overall wellbeing. So make sure you’re:

These aren’t “nice to haves” – they’re your foundation for feeling calm and capable.

You’re not failing, you’re paying attention

Remember, experiencing money anxiety doesn’t mean you’re failing. It just means you’re paying attention and you’re ready for change. That’s a good thing.

You don’t need to overhaul everything overnight. Just take the first step and then another. That’s how financial peace is built: slowly, kindly and one small decision at a time.

Feature image: iStock/Liubomyr Vorona

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